Joke of the DAY
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Good Memory
     Two elderly couple were having evening tea and talking about last night
they saw a movie, One man said that this movie was very good and he enjoyed a lot.
the other man asked what is the name of that movie,
first man asked the other man, what is the name of that flower usually we give to
our girls on first date and has thorns in the branch, The second man Said Rose,
First Man,  hay Rose what was the name of the movie we saw last night.

Love Crime
In the known history, any president of USA ever investigated
was for Hate or Criminal activity.
Only Clinton has the honor to be investigated for " Love Crimes "

Top 10 Rejection Lines Given By Women (and what they actually mean...)
10.  I think of you as a brother. (You remind me of that inbred
     banjo-playing geek in "Deliverance.")
9.  There's a slight difference in our ages. (I don't want to do my dad)
8.  I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way. (You are the ugliest dork
    I've ever laid eyes upon.)
7.  My life is too complicated right now. (I don't want you spending
    the whole night or else you may hear phone calls from all the other
    guys I'm seeing.)
6.  I've got a boyfriend (I prefer my male cat and a half gallon of
    Ben and Jerry's).
5.  I don't date men where I work. (I wouldn't date you if  you were in
    the same 'solar system', much less the same building.)
4.  It's not you, it's me. (It's you.)
3.  I'm concentrating on my career. (Even something as boring and
    unfulfilling as my job is better than dating you.)
2.  I'm celibate. (I've sworn off only the men like you.)
...and the number 1 rejection line given by women (and what it
actually means)
1.  Let's be friends. (I want you to stay around so I can tell you in
    excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and have sex with.
    It's that male perspective thing)

                  And now...the top 10 things that sound dirty in law, but aren't:

10. Have you looked through her briefs?
9. He is one hard judge!
8. Counselor, let's do it in chambers.
7. His attorney withdrew at the last minute.
6. Is it a penal offense?
5. Better leave the handcuffs on.
4. For $200 an hour, she better be good!
3. Can you get him to drop his suit?
2. The judge gave her the stiffest one he could.
1. Think you can get me off?

The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter
is uncopyrightable.
Facetious and abstemious contain all the vowels in the correct order,
as does arsenious, meaning "containing arsenic."
A man and an attractive woman were having candlelit dinner when the waitor saw the man slowly sliding out of his chair and under the table. The woman seemed not to notice as her companion disappeared out of sight.
Pardon me, ma'am," the waitor said, "I think your husband is under the table".
"No, he isn't." the woman said, eyeing the waitor calmly "My husband just walked through the door."

Special High Intensity Training

TO     : All Employees
FROM   : Management

In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity
from employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well
trained through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING
(S.H.I.T.). We are trying to give employees more S.H.I.T. than anyone

If you feel that you do not receive your fair share of S.H.I.T. on the
job, please see your manager. You will be immediately placed at the
top of the S.H.I.T. list, and our managers are especially skilled at
seeing that you get all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.

Employees who don't take their S.H.I.T. will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL
EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T.). Those who fail to take
D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING
(E.A.T.S.H.I.T.). Since our managers took S.H.I.T. before they were
promoted, they  don't have to do S.H.I.T. anymore, they are full of
S.H.I.T. already.

If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be interested in a job training
others. We can add you name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST
(B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T.). Those who are full of B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T. will get
the S.H.I.T. jobs, and can apply for promotion to DIRECTOR OF

If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF

Thank You,


 A long article on Cow. Please click here  and a Teacher's Speach